Tuesday, May 30, 2006

animals that make it difficult to play the piano

When I refer to "animals" that make it difficult to play the piano, I am really just referring to one specific animal, of the orange tabby cat variety, who goes by the name of Rue.

Rue, Dearest,

It was a joy to have you in my lap, arching your back under my arms and walking over the keys of my keyboard, but you've got to understand my love, that it makes it extremely difficult to play the piano well (or at all) when I have a nose bumping my fingers off of the keys or a head lifting my arms so high that I can't reach the keys. In the "Allegro Burlesco" that I was playing, the key words are "Allegro Burlesco," which means that the notes are supposed to be played quickly and preferably, accurately. Unless your paws can contribute the correct notes at the correct time, perhaps you should just be an astute listener. And dearest Rue, when I was trying to sing the Italian aria "Sento nel core" while playing the piece on the keyboard at the same time, the keys you ended up pressing weren't quite (or at all) in the same key. Playing an instrument while singing in Italian isn't easy on a good day, and although "Sento nel core" means "Sorrow Unending" or something similarily depressing, it's not an entirely contemporary piece, so constant dischord is not the way to go.

I realize that you are a cat, and as a cat, it is your duty to walk all over whatever it is I am in the middle of doing. And yes, most likely you can't tell the difference between the incorrect d minor chord and the correct d minor diminished chord, but I propose a compromise. How about next time I try to play or sing at my keyboard, you sit on the floor near me and just meow along? I think that I can handle that. I still love you, Rue.

16 comments:

Kelly said...

Mr. Engineer, I'd just like to point out that I didn't pick her name, or the spelling of her name. It was "Rue" at the SPCA and I decided to keep it that way. And I like it. :) But, I appreciate your extensive research and I'll send you a scarf to wear in hell. Hehe.

Anonymous said...

Meow...meow...meow...

Translated: I'm tone deaf.

Anonymous said...

I think with all this bashing going on about Rue's ability to be a musician - I think she must still receive credit for the assumption that she can read the blog written to her...and here I thought all she did was play with toys and pee in beds. Way to go Rue! That cat is amazing and I miss her.
~J. HumHum

Anonymous said...

I think with all this bashing going on about Rue's ability to be a musician - I think she must still receive credit for the assumption that she can read the blog written to her...and here I thought all she did was play with toys and pee in beds. Way to go Rue! That cat is amazing and I miss her.
~J. HumHum

Kelly said...

Finally, J.HumHum actually posts under his normal name! Woooo!

In reference to your post, we all should not underestimate the powers of Rue. She saved my life once, remember?

Anonymous said...

Rue did save your life! What an awesome kitty =)

Anonymous said...

haha...my "normal name"
hey now - i still never took the blame for the majority of those anonymous messages - just a couple of 'em. so your mystery has yet to be solved, kelly! however, i do believe you were a horrible detective the night of mystery dinner playhouse...ok - i know i sucked as well, but at least i got a prize! woot woot! :P
and hopefully you don't encounter any vampires along the way - because we both know how horrible you are at fighting those. let's just face it - it's hopeless. one thing you are good at... being uber-eautiful ;)

J.Hum.ersons

Kelly said...

J.Hum-er-whatever,

You obviously don't know that I am a direct descendant of one of the greatest detectives ever employed by Scotland Yard. I also was the main point-of-contact for the creators and writers of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer." I let you do better in both aspects because as a guy, you're masculinity would be threaten if a superior woman such as myself beat you in any competition.

Anonymous said...

BURN!!

Hahahahahaha! I love you kelbel!

Anonymous said...

Hey now - I don't deal well with stereotypes...I actually find that offensive and very discriminatory.
It just so happens - I would love to be dominated by you, Kelly.
~J. ummm...Anonymous

Kelly said...

Lord, help me.

Anonymous said...

Kelly-

How may I help my dear? I'm awfully busy but for you I will stop the world. Wait. Last time I did that, the dinosaurs died. I'll think of a better expression for "I would do anything for you." Wait. That's a song from "Oliver". Just let me know and I will reply as soon as divinely possible.

Eternally yours,

The Lord

Anonymous said...

hahaha! That's great! For the record - I thought of responding with that, but I didn't. I am claiming all of my comments from here on out...just so you know...
J.Hum-whatever

Anonymous said...

hahaha! That's great! For the record - I thought of responding with that, but I didn't. I am claiming all of my comments from here on out...just so you know...
J.Hum-whatever

Kelly said...

Wow, I didn't know that The Lord read my blog! I think the only thing that really concerned me was the whole topic of "domination." Yeah, kind of not cool.

But hey, thanks for Rue - and for the creation of Josh Groban. Exquisite work.

Anonymous said...

Well, once again, twas not me acting as "The Lord"...
and as far as the "domination" thing goes...I was speaking of world domination and looking forward to you becoming the supreme ruler over us all.
Get your head out of the gutter there, Kelly :P
Jo.Mi.Lu.