the hierarchy of power. forgotten.

Sometimes I have to remind the people in my life that one day I will rule the world. And although I am not Ruler of All right now, the powers of such should be accorded to me now in anticipation of my future position. Some people ignore me. Some people laugh like they think I'm joking. The wise people listen.

So when The Shamana, one of my long-trusted advisors, commanded me to write more on this blog, I was a little taken aback. COMMAND?? What the? Come again? -shakes head in disbelief-

But because I am merciful, I will not make her life misery. I will allow her to keep her job as advisor and as punishment, will only recount to her in excruciating detail the "melted candy bar in the diaper" game sometimes played at baby showers.

Think melted Snickers, The Shamana. Melted Snickers.

because who needs size regulations in the pizza industry? not me. that's for certain.

I had never, ever seen a pizza slice that big.

I have no clue how it even fits the definition of a "slice."

Why did no one tell me that ordering two slices of pizza from this place was like ordering an entire pizza pie? I only bring this up because multiple people questioned my ordering of two slices behind my back, without informing me that one slice was enough to feed a small country. Oh the injustice! -shakes fist toward the sky-

You may be asking, "Why does it matter? Pizza is pizza. It is yummy and delish no matter what the size. In fact, the bigger the better, in my opinion."

You have a good point. That pizza was goooooooooood. Even if it was the size of my head.